SW Review Sites are a Joke and Savvy SWers Exploit Them
- 10 hours ago
- 11 min read
Review sites gave me C-PTSD and I'm only kinda joking.
Imagine naive, insecure Rose, setting out on her SW adventure in 2006 as she fires up her laptop and posts her first Craigslist ad, not knowing anything about anything. There was no Twitter, Bluesky, Reddit or anyone I could talk to and share resources/support with. Nowadays, providers can read every post on r/sexwork, join group chats and buy tons of SW "mentorship" courses before even posting an ad. But some of us original, utterly vampiric gangsters didn't have that option.
We simply had a big set of labia lips and a rebel heart.
Meaning, we fucked up over, and over, and over, and over, and... over until we got it right and figured out a few things.
She's An Ugly Junky with "AIDS" ✨
One of those things I fucked up on (because I didn't know it was a thing) was not realizing that so-called "review" boards could be exploited by savvy providers. When I obtained my first "reviews" on TER, they claimed I was ugly, "fat," was horrible during sessions, had "AIDS" and was an IV drug "junky." I understandably didn't feel so great about that and thought my money making days were over. Sitting in front of my laptop, mouth agape, you better believe I needed to actually become a "junky" in order to deal with the self-hating thoughts swirling around my mind and the panic flooding my body as I read the most cruel things I'd ever heard about myself and contemplated how much money these lies had probably cost me.
Many SWers will tell you similar stories about how "reviews" broke a piece of their soul and their bank account. This shit cuts, burns and is unforgettable when we're young and more vulnerable.
My brain kept obsessing, going over and over all of the horrible things written about "me" that triggered my insecurities. I was the skinniest I'd ever been but due to the pro-ana culture I grew up with in the 90's/early 2000s, I genuinely hated my body and thought I was fat/ugly. Those words written in my first "reviews" are emblazed on my brain and I had to find out about them via a client who let me know that he was glad he'd seen me despite my horrible "reviews" that I didn't even know existed.
At the time, I was a new fish in the SW sea and clearly was threatening to the others providers in the area.
One of their P's (or one of the providers) thought they'd improve their business by bashing mine on TER. This made sense at the time because there were so few women doing FSSW. If they could knock me out of the game with fake bad reviews, maybe they could increase their profits.
Nowadays, it's stupid for someone to waste their time writing fake reviews because there's simply too much competition. They'd be writing fake reviews all day when they'd make a lot more money focusing on improving themselves and their businesses. Additionally, most clients I see today don't even check TER or care much about it so a provider's business isn't really impacted by faux bad reviews on the site, especially if we have a few good reviews in place.
Wait, You Mean I Can Turn the Tables?
Fake reviews were and are extremely common but at the time, I didn't realize that, all along, I had the power.
Instead, I watched in horror as I was "reviewed" by someone in my old homebase who clearly was getting a sociopathic pleasure out of harming women's businesses, lives and health. Since I was only doing SW part time, I wasn't really paying attention to SW or thinking about it much but after many years and digging around on the internet, I heard from other providers about the "reviews" they were planting for themselves and other providers on review sites.
Aha! Then a little pink neon lightbulb went off in my brain. Wait, you mean I can turn the tables and take control of my own narrative on these horrible, objectifying, fake, man-run, women-hating sites? Tell me more!
Of course, I'd never write myself a ton of extremely raunchy reviews that sound as if they were written by a low IQ man.
I'd never write very explicit, degrading, nasty, fake reviews (with a little negging/body shaming for added realism) of my SW persona in order to drastically increase my profits.
Nay, nay, I would never, ever exploit a dehumanizing, inherently misogynistic system that ranks vulnerable women like cattle on a scale from 1-10, and use said inherently exploitative system to level up and make a shit ton of money. OMG! No way!
SW Review Sites Hate Women
For those who are unaware, the most influential "review board," TER, was started in 1999 by a misogynistic, hateful lil man (who tried to have an escort murdered because she refused to f*ck him or be listed on his site) named David Elms who claimed he had a "bad experience" with a companion so he started TER to protect the "vulnerable" men of this world from... escorts, arguably an actually vulnerable group of women.
Think about it: The entire narrative structure of TER was created by a man who was mad at a woman for not giving him sex in the way he thought he was owed said sex. The site was created by a man who tried to murder a provider.
Let that sink in.
Now, go browse TER with an informed eye and tell me this hatred/misogyny isn't incredibly obvious in the language, forum posts and structure of the site. This theme can be applied to all SW "review" sites.
Men who frequently write "reviews" on "review sites" are getting off by lording their power over SWers, arguably some of the most vulnerable women in society.
Worst case scenario, a guy sees a provider and doesn't like her. Oh wow, so sad. How will he survive?
It's ridiculous that there are so many of these "review" sites considering how little men have at stake when they see a provider. If they had a modicum of sense (as most of my clients do), they could check her socials to verify that she's not a cop. (Cops don't create years of social media posts before they pretend to be a SW in order to arrest a guy.)
There's no point to review sites.
They are simply a place where certain men like to tell one another their sex fantasies and some enjoy the power they can lord over women by objectifying and rating them.
Back in 1999, more risky services like kissing with tongue and B**J were not standard so I assume the "bad" experience the TER founder had that spurred him to create the site was (shock horror) covered or*l. This theory is based on the site's emphasis on B**J and kissing with tongue, with providers who don't provide these services unable to rank above a 7 on TER. If a provider doesn't do B**J during the session, she, by default, can't rank high on the site so, over the years, B**J became standard due to TER's powerful influence.
The site ranks our appearance and "performance" on a 1-10 scale when these things are inherently objective and humans can't be ranked/objectified/dehumanized. I mean, yes, you can try to "rank" us but it doesn't logically make sense and is only in service of the wounded masculine ego, but I digress. (The healed masculine doesn't really use sites like TER because he's stopped trying to control everything/women and can read a provider's energy via her words and images.)
Social Media Made Review Sites Irrelevant
Before social media, TER was the only way clients could "learn" about and investigate providers so I understand why more old school clients still use the site out of habit. Back in the day, SW ad sites like BP didn't require ID verification so many a man was conned during the pre-FOSTA SESTA days. Clients would tell me how they were led down an alley and robbed when going to meet a supposed provider. Sometimes, they'd show up and the girl would be a totally different person and look nothing like the woman in the photos.
I understand why clients used TER before provider websites and socials became the norm but now? I keep my TER around simply because it makes me money (due to the few guys who refuse to see providers not listed on the site) but I would do fine without it.
Older review sites like TER never would have amassed the amount of power that they have if they were launched today because clients can look at our socials, websites and blogs to determine whether we're "real" or whether we're scammers. Intelligent clients don't need easily faked "reviews" to determine whether or not to book a provider.
Any provider who's had the displeasure of emailing with TER's moderators knows how terse, bitchy, nasty and downright antagonistic they are to the (mostly) women who's labor pays their bills and keeps their little site up and running.
They need us, not the other way around.
I've been emailing TER, trying to get my profile delisted for months and, short of hiring an attorney to send them a cease and desist, there's nothing I can do so I said, fuck it. I'll let these little bitches continue lining my pockets but I am morally opposed to my SW brand existing on such an evil site.
My Advice to Newer Providers
Many providers complain that they're barely making any money yet they refuse to do the work to get themselves listed on TER and get a few totally "real" reviews posted. If you can afford to lose money, don't get listed on the site but if you are looking to maximize profits, the site does make a SW seem "established." The site makes money for new providers.
When I rebranded a few years ago and wasn't listed on TER, I was wondering why I wasn't getting many new inquiries and it was because many clients still utilize TER to "verify" newer providers. My stalker is, according to many news reports and court cases/restraining orders, verifiably unwell and I knew she'd end up writing me one or two fake TER reviews so I purposely stayed away from the site and didn't want it associated with my business. Because I had to start new social medias, I had few followers and little online presence so guys were hesitant to book me. My writing was pretty stagnant at the time so I also didn't have the hugely important selling point of these blogs that clients tell me swayed them into meeting me.
As I wrote about in a prior blog post, my stalker (another provider) wrote me a fake TER review and contacted TER to have them update my work info on my old TER to reflect the work info (website, email address) associated with my new brand. This was the best thing anyone could have ever done for me because I immediately started making a lot more money due to my not being established at the time. TER gave that extra little push that made more clients book me. As usual, all of the abuse this woman has put me through only made me hotter, stronger and richer.
Every time a new review is posted, that provider's profile is bumped to the top of the page for her city and put in front of the eyeballs of hobbyist TER users. This encourages providers to use the site as an ad site and plant fake reviews or buy a ton of $40 Amazon tablets in order to review themselves/their friends so their profiles get more exposure. This is part of the reason why some providers have 50 TER reviews. Sure, some providers tour constantly, have been in the game forever under the same name and/or have lower rates and higher volume so they'd have more reviews.
There are SW "mentors" who also offer to post TER reviews for their mentees. So, yes, I usually tell newer provider to get on TER if they're doing SW full time but I also tell them about all the drawbacks and dangers.
Slobbylist clients use TER like an ad site and scroll the homepage for their city because they claim they've been scammed while using actual ad sites. These guys are generally very, very cheap and I have found that they won't spend over $400 an hour in NYC. This is why having new reviews posted, which bumps my profile to the top of the search results, doesn't benefit me anymore. TER slobbyists can't afford to see me.
Be My Knight in Shining Sedan?
One of the reasons why TER is more popular than other review sites is that they require the reviews posted on their site to be erotica AKA free jerk-off material. A "play-by-play" supposedly detailing every sweaty lick, hump and dump is required if you want the basement dwelling troll TER mods to post a review. It's sick, twisted and it makes money because sex sells.
It feels like non-consensual erotic stories are being written about us when a guy posts a TER review so I never read mine. Nope. Absolutely not. If the review sounds negative, then I'll check it out (to see if it's my stalker) but I don't read the positive reviews because I don't want that in my head. Going on TER legit makes me anxious and I get a pit in the bottom of my stomach. Bad, bad vibes, bro.
I emphasize the toxic dump that is TER to hopefully uproot some of the oppressive sway this abusive site has on the good clients out there. Stop supporting a website that was created by a man who tried to have a companion murdered and that is universally hated for a reason. Sure, publicly most providers play along by pretending like they want reviews (as I used to) but really, we wish someone would put a stop to a system in which we must tolerate this. Be our Knights in Shining Sedans?
Imagine how it feels for a woman to have a man (or some stalker/troll) writing in graphic detail about her intimate time with him/private parts and ranking her from 1-10 based on her body: her tits, her ass and her pussy. This is not flattering.
If you ask any FSSW, "How would you feel if every review site shut down tomorrow?" they would be exhaling a huge sigh of relief. No one actually want to be dehumanized in that way and playing the game requires so much fucking labor. Remember the good ole days when men were simply happy to be with a pretty lass? Why must everything be commodified and/or faked/performed for online consumption?
It helps me out a lot when you hit "like" on my Bluesky post promoting this blog and comment regarding your experience with TER. Thank you for connecting with me by reading my lil bloggy blog! Send me money if you're a man because a) I'm hot and b) reparations and c) I need pounds and pounds of organic turkey meat. Whole Foods gift cards are greatly appreciated. ❤️
Thank you to my stalker. This blog is dedicated to you, bitch. I am so glad your crazy ass decided to set it's obsessive laser wonky eyes upon me because girl, you getting me back onto TER made me SO MUCH
MONEY! hahahahaha! Praise Jesus. Keep up the good work because I get bored when the fake booking inquiries stop and no one's lying about me on the internet. We need a little spice, a little pizzaz to keep things interesting. I wouldn't have been able to afford my trip to Mexico, laser tattoo removal, or my expensive lifestyle if it wasn't for you forcing me to start mediating... which led to a spiritual awakening... which led to me become a bruja and Santa Muerte practitioner/prosperous hottie...Thank you for showing me my shadow, what I could have become, and what I needed to kill inside myself.
Gracias, perra fea, por obligarme a matar aquellas partes de mí que ya estaban muertas. Por el poder de la Santa Muerte, sabes que estás condenada, ahora y para siempre, a enfermar gravemente, a ser pobre, fea y miserable por el mal que has hecho y sigues haciendo.
Amén.
So shall it be.
Send me a lil gift card and be blessed 4 lyfe ❤️
