Why MILFs Make More Money: Ageism and S*x Work
- Rose B
- 3 days ago
- 13 min read
"Women who do SW over the age of 30 are sad. Pathetic. They should have made enough money to retire by now. Could never be me!" reads a SW X viral tweet. Ok, I just made that sentence up because I barely use X and didn't think to save the barrage of ageist tweets I've seen since I joined the platform in 2018/2019. (I forget when I joined, TBH.)
A friend informed me that an online worker recently posted a viral tweet about this same, played out, ignorant topic that's merely a reflection of the poster's insecurities projected at the world. Reddit and X feature tons of ageist posts by admirers and providers alike, but there are an increasing number of providers over the age of 35 (or, dare I say, 40/50!) who are pushing back against these false thoughts espoused by evolutionary psychology, misogyny and consumer culture.
As the film The Substance so candidly and grotesquely explains, women face immense pressure to remain eternally infantile and there's an especially overwhelming pressure within entertainment industries (like SW) to dismiss women who are over the age of 30. Demi Moore's character is considered "too old" to work in TV at the age of 50 and injects herself with a Substance that creates a younger, "perfect" version of herself and then battles with "herself"/her looks for the entire film.
A woman must be incredibly strong to push back against society's ageism and devaluing of women over the age of 25. Yet when we do, we realize that none of it's real and that ageism is a construct, a narrative that can be shifted if we do the work.
Despite what you may think, I'm far more prosperous and happy now that I'm over, say, 33 (*wink*) than I was when I looked 18.
How can this be? How is this magical feat possible? My clients are totally superior compared to the ones I saw as a "college girl." They're far more generous, thoughtful, sweet, and kind and yet, considering mainstream ageism, you'd think my pussy and my sexy worker life would be dusty as heck as a non-25-year-old.
Why are so many MILFy providers extremely successful despite what trolls online (and other SWers) preach? Why has my income skyrocketed since I began using the cringe, cheesy, slightly dehumanizing term "MILF" in my ad headlines and social media posts?
Men Find Women Less Attractive Over the Age of 19
Listing my work age as 30 felt like detonating a bomb that would blow up my ability to earn as a SW. Due to my amazing genetics, buccal fat that I didn't have sucked out of my face and expeditious use of umbrellas when in the sun, I felt as though I could get away with listing my age on ad sites as under 30 indefinitely. But as I slowly increased my public age, the quality of my clients also increased (as did my income) and I finally realized that the high quality men who book providers generally want to have a real relationship with said provider and real relationships aren't solely based on aesthetics/age.
Although online dating surveys may conclude that men find women to be less attractive over the age of 19, this depressing statistic is just that: a meaningless stat that doesn't reflect how humans actually behave when in relationships. Plus, dating websites may attract (or make us) more insecure and lookist. There's a certain type of person who uses dating websites as opposed to in-person community to find partners. All we see on dating websites is an image, age, and occupation instead of the whole personality and what people self report (in terms of what they find to be attractive) doesn't necessarily correlate to action in terms of who they date.
Evolutionary Psychology: Must Spread Seed
Evolutionary psychologists like the anti-gender equality creepo Jordan Peterson believe that human behavior and preference come down to the need to procreate and therefore men are more attracted to younger, "fertile" women. They claim that psychological traits evolved in the way that biological traits have and although I do find value in certain aspects of evolutionary psychology, it oversimplifies and can be a dangerous way to justify discrimination.
I'm not saying that behavior isn't partially driven by the need to "spread our seed," I guess, but our world has evolved as have our emotions and nothing in this life is black or white. As I always preach, life is one big grey area that's up for interpretation and full of nuance, something not conveyed via 250 character tweets and 15 second Tik Toks. We are still driven by primal urges but live in a modern setting and evolutionary psychology can't really be proven or disproven.
Femme SW as a Dichotomy: Teen or MILF
Men may be highly attracted to "teens," as evidenced by the popularity of "teen" adult content, but MILF p0rn was the second most searched for category on Pornhub in 2025. Explain that, evolutionary psychologists/Jordan Petersons. You can't. Ha! Explain why "Femboy" was also a top search. If folks are only motivated by procreation, why is so much of our sexual activity not procreation based? There's tons of gay sex going on out here in these freaky streets and the evolutionary "need to spread seed" can't account for it.
Therefore, the evolutionary psychology ethos of "men only like fertile teens" doesn't make sense.
A well known and intelligent porn actor, Sterling Cooper, discusses how femme sexuality is marketed as a dichotomy, which may explain the popularity of MILFs. Although I disagree with him on a few things, he expressed what I've known (via my 19 years of experience in and out of SW) about the way women are portrayed by capitalist sex culture: We're either "barely legal teens" or MILFs, although many "MILFs" look young as heck. Cooper discusses how a porn actress who can't pull off being a "teen" and is too young to be a MILF (30+) finds it harder to work during this period of her life from age 25-30 and many women drop out of the business during this stage.
I think this can also be applied to in-person SW: I found it more difficult to earn in the stage between "college girl" and MILF. There's something about those two categories that triggers something within men's pornified brains and prompts them to focus and actually book a session as opposed to lurking for years.
The Manosphere Loves MILFs
This "older women are hot" trope isn't one that has really sunk in within the mainstream culture. Younger men being "into" older women is an overwhelmingly popular idea I see portrayed all the time in online spaces where a younger, more male demographic exists. This love of MILFs is seen on YouTube, especially in the younger, male, extremely popular brosphere where I lurk, hiding amidst the underbrush like a corseted alligator studying how best to entice my prey. Don't ask why I enjoy listening to and watching manosphere content but I find it fascinating and fun to attempt to understand how certain men think.
A very popular bro fitness dude, Jesse James West, is constantly joking about how he loves "Mommies" and bigger, muscular women. It's a relatable (to his audience) and long running joke that the younger, hot, buff Jesse really likes being told what to do by "Moms." Danny Duncan, another ridiculously popular Youtuber, wears and sells t-shirts stating his love of MILFs and older women in his multimillion view Youtube videos. This video garnered 4.3 million views and features Danny in a "I ❤️ Moms" t-shirt, available for purchase via a merch partnership.
Men, especially younger men, being sexually attracted to older women is something that's totally normalized and promoted within 20-35 year-old male internet pop culture, a fact that older men and femmes may not comprehend or be aware of. My awareness of young men and their love of older women as more than just a niche expanded as I began delving into content targeted at young men.
The term "MILF" was popularized in 1999 by the film American Pie and was first documented in a 1992 article on slang, according to my brief research. I think it arose due to p0rn marketers' needing a sexy way to describe women who didn't look 18.
Madonna or Whore, teen or MILF, women can't be fully fledged, multidimensional humans according to a patriarchal system that functions via reducing and controlling us. Note how the term "MILF" only gives value to women who have children, reinforcing the patriarchal notion that women must have children and be in proximity to men if we want to hold value within society. The term "cougar" isn't as sexy because it's doesn't denote our status as Mother, a valuable identity within our patriarchal system.
As long as capitalism exists, humans will have to dehumanize ourselves in different ways and work for others in order to survive and we will do what we feel as though we must do in order to have healthcare, shelter and a quality life. There are many ways to prostitute oneself, as Maya Angelou (former pimp and SW) said. This includes frequently selling/marketing/branding ourselves as either "college girls" or "MILFs," but I urge my fellow providers to consider adding a few years to their age if they're under 30. The dudes I saw when I advertised as a "college girl" (for ten years hahaha) were a totally different type compared to the gentlemen I see today and I'm not just saying that because I'm trying to stroke the egos of my admirers.
The "College Girl"
Men see younger providers because they're easier to manipulate. Get into the mental space for a moment of a man in this 30's-70's who sees providers who are 10+ years younger than him. Sure, youth is attractive but so are women who are 30, 40, 50 and as we age, we find people who are our age to be more appealing. Why would a man only want to see "college girls"?
Insecure men want women in their 20's because women in their 20's are less sure of themselves and are far easier to manipulate. Yes, some clients may see providers within every age group but many do only target providers in their 20's, therefore making it more dangerous to advertise as a "college girl." Infantilizing ourselves is always dangerous for a variety of reasons: Men will respect us less, possibly leading them to harm us in some way. Men would more frequently try to demand things from me when I was in my 20's and that rarely happens now.
Of course not all young women are insecure but generally speaking, they're far, far less confident and experienced so they're easier to control, although they don't see themselves this way. As a provider, you don't realize how much more confident you become with age until you... age.
Through no fault of my own, I was an absolute trainwreck in my 20s and it took me many years to realize that I was good enough. It's still a concept I must reinforce to myself daily and I'm fighting with all my might against everything women are taught to believe by doing so.
SW on SW Ageism
Body, looks and age shaming on social media and within SW communities is extremely prevalent so people may not realize that women over the age of 30/40 can be super successful. We say (without saying it) that we're afraid of looking old by normalizing Botox, overpriced beauty products, plastic surgery and commenting about how older SWers are "sad" and/or should leave the business. We discuss how we don't want to do SW at an "old" age and need to get out of the business ASAP. Providers I considered to be friends would lie to me about their age despite my confiding in them and telling them my real age at a time when I'd never publicly admit to it.
I'll never forget when a SW former "friend" who was 39 told me she was 26 due to the pressures of ageism within SW (and her own unrecognized issues that don't allow her to love herself or others). Like many providers, she doesn't post videos online that are filter-free and her photos are highly, cartoonishly edited so I had no idea what she really looked like and accepted that sure, she was 26 despite it not really making sense given her life story. She was always crapping on other SWers and referring to them as "old," a common behavior pattern: We are understandably insecure about being over the age of 30 so we project this insecurity onto other workers.
Her behavior is not out of the norm although it is shitty. SW on SW age shaming is super prevalent in strip clubs, massage parlors and within online SW ecosystems. Classy providers age shame privately (or not at all), so as to not to get semi-cancelled, but the most trollish ones (who understand that all PR is good PR) will be blatantly ageist in order to garner attention.
People confide in me and tell me things they'd never tell anyone else because I discuss what I've survived in my life and my insecurities (because I know they're not real and don't define me). People feel comfortable with me because I'm so open. Other providers have privately told me, "I can't pretend to be 22 anymore. I told a guy at the club that I was 22 and he didn't believe me. OMG, I'm so old! I can't believe I'm 27. That's almost 30! I planned to be a landlord by this age, not a humble wh0re and kinkster!"
Another SW actually said that to me, knowing that I'm older than her. Like, huh? You realize you're age shaming me right now, telling me I'm old and that that's the worst thing ever? This SW is super cool, super chill, a spiritualist, and you wouldn't think she would be freaking out about the fact that she can't pretend to be 23 anymore.
She hid this raging insecurity beneath a veneer of austere confidence that no one would pick up on unless they knew her extremely well. Some of the hottest, baddest bitches are terrified of passing the dreaded 3-0 age marker.
Ah, I remember when I was under 30. I thought I was so old and that the world was ending at age 29 and it's not my fault: Our culture is supremely ageist and it's reflected in film, TV and online culture. Actresses over the age of 30 stop getting roles while the decrepit Sly Stallones are starring in Rocky 10. The only women I've known who reject ageism 1000% had super cool hippie-ish moms who also rejected ageism or have done a ton of spiritual work.
SW is still seen as the worst thing a woman can do to earn a living so there's a lot of pressure to only work for a few years and miraculously retire as a billionaire at age 24. This was possible in the early 2000s but is now extremely difficult to achieve and rare, despite glamorization online making us believe that every SW is basking in red bottoms and sugar daddies. That's part of the reason why workers who are over 30 are seen as lesser than: Whorephobia. Stigma.
We should only do SW for a few years because it's so bad and terrible.
Believing MILF Into Existence Through Trauma
If we believe that we can thrive as an "old" SWer and engage in certain healing/self love practices, then we can. The reason why I'm much more prosperous as a non-college-girl-provider isn't merely due to the fact that I exploit a niche that happens to be popular. Part of my increased prosperity is due to the fact that I went through traumatic experiences in my life and that forced me to try certain healing practices. Either I continued suffering, or I rewired my brain and began telling myself how Sacred, Divine, and hot I was.
Miraculously, as my age crept up, I no longer needed beauty filters to hide myself in videos. I didn't need to edit out my body fat or supposed imperfections. The Facetune filter was now at 1 instead of 11. (Progress, not perfection.) I began getting high on my own supply of unfiltered videos and now love filming myself. In the past, I ridiculously overedited my photos despite being younger and, according to mainstream ageism, "hotter." The oversized t-shirt I wore to hide myself at the gym was replaced by slutty outfits that may or may not showcase the occasional nip slip. I've always loved attention but, when I was younger, I didn't always have the confidence to show myself as I really am.
(Yes, I know that 100% spiritually evolved humans don't care about image/looks and spend their time living in communes atop off-grid mountains but everyone else who lives in reality d0es care about how others perceive us. SWers are especially aware of our images.)
My pubic hair is no longer fully waxed, Naired or shaved into oblivion because I simply don't care and neither do my admirers.
The comfort I feel within a more "imperfect" body is magical and this was not possible as a "college girl."
The clients I attract today, as opposed to the clients I saw in my "college girl" years, are interested in emotional connection. They don't try to pull one over on me. They mention my "weird" blogs and how they perceive me as a person as opposed to a tool used only for their satisfaction. An awesomely kind, interesting and generous admirer recently brought up how interested and impressed he was by a blog post (The Patron Saint of the LGBTQ Community and S*x Work: La Santa Muerte) that other people told me not to write because it was too personal, too weird, and too unsexy.
The men I attract today are deep, emotional, kind and open minded.
This is going to sound super witchy-magical-woo-woo and only a few of ya'll will get what I'm saying, but as I've entered into my MILF-hood, I've finally done enough healing work to realize why I'm here on this earth, a gift that the "college girl" version of me didn't have and that's the main reason why I'm far more prosperous
It was 6 AM and I'd just returned from a 12-hour emergency room visit. As I was meditating (as an attempt to escape from severe physical and emotional pain), it felt like a flood of joy and awakening washed through my brain and body while an overwhelming feeling radiated through my consciousness: You're here to tell your crazy ass stories.
OMG, I'm here for a reason? This life isn't meaningless?
I learned that I am here to heal myself and others via my storytelling and therefore, my blogs will always lead to my prosperity because it's what I'm meant to do. Most people couldn't talk about what I talk about and make money doing it as a SW.
And that is the gift of MILFdom. We suffer through our "college girl" years, pretending like we have our shit together while life keeps hitting us with trauma. Merely existing under our current economic system is traumatizing, according to Dr. Gabor Mate. Then, we suffer enough and become so physically and emotionally uncomfortable that we have to either give up or change everything. We begin to embrace ourselves and therefore, the world (and other people) embrace us.
Please, for the love of Holy Death, don't forget to hit ❤️on my Bluesky post promoting this blog and let me know about your experiences with ageism and SW.
Admirers: If you'd like to show your appreciation for my writing and tireless posting of gorgeous content on social media during this holiday season, a gift from my wish list is forever cherished! Giving back to those who give to you = good energy = more blessings for you. Helping me actually helps you, energetically speaking.
Or you can send me a gift card. Please email (or text) me first for instructions on how to do so. redrose007ny@gmail.com (Please only use my Protonmail email if you're also using Proton otherwise there's a good chance your email will go to my spam.)